Blog Tour: HIJINKS, HITCHHIKERS, AND MAYHEM by Gail Koger

 

HIJINKS, HITCHHIKERS AND MAYHEM

Gail Koger

 

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GENRE:  Action/adventure, RomCom, Fantasy

 

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BLURB:

 

All Casey wanted was to have hot, mind-blowing sex with Hothar, her soul mate. That little fantasy went up in smoke when she’s stuck babysitting a cowardly witch who is the galaxy’s only hope of survival.

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Excerpt Three:

 

“Next up is Aphrodite, Goddess of Love,” a voice shouted over the titty bar loudspeakers.

 

No freakin’ way. The witch wouldn’t be stupid enough to audition as a stripper when we were hunting her, would she? Nah. It was just a coincidence. There were probably lots of dancers who called themselves Aphrodite, the Goddess of Love.

 

Aphrodite’s bell-shaped breasts bobbed wildly as she ran out on the stage, wearing only a pink G-string.

 

Hitch made a noise like a cat hacking up a hairball.

 

Yep, that summed it up. What had happened to Aphrodite’s dream of being a chorus girl in Vegas?

 

The men in the audience whistled and stomped their feet as Aphrodite humped the pole like an inebriated caterpillar.

 

“Move your ass,” someone shouted.

 

The witch twitched her butt spasmodically.

 

Holy hell. Aphrodite had no sense of rhythm, nor could she dance. Ugh. Enough was enough. I wound my way through the tables and jumped up onto the stage. “Are you insane? We’re leaving now.”

 

Aphrodite glared at me. “Go away.”

 

Dozens of cockroaches scurried over my sandals. “Wazzock’s piss!” I hopped around like a crazy person trying to dislodge the little beasts.

 

Hitch trilled in excitement and the roaches began to vanish.

 

The men shouted, “Shake it baby. Shake it!”

 

Aphrodite shoved me. “Get off the stage. You’re ruining my routine.”

 

“Routine?” I did a tap dance on the bugs. “This is a cockroach-infested titty bar, not Vegas.”

 

“You’re spoiling everything,” Aphrodite snarled.

 

“You’ll thank me later. Where are your clothes?”

 

“I’m not leaving,” Aphrodite shrieked.

 

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AUTHOR Bio and Links:

 

I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for the Glendale Police Department and to keep from going totally bonkers – I mean people have no idea what a real emergency is. Take this for example: I answered, “9-1-1 emergency, what’s your emergency?” And this hysterical woman yelled, “My bird is in a tree.” Sometimes I really couldn’t help myself, so I said, “Birds have a tendency to do that, ma’am.” The woman screeched, “No! You don’t understand. My pet parakeet is in the tree. I’ve just got to get him down.” Like I said, not a clue. “I’m sorry ma’am but we don’t get birds out of trees.” The woman then cried, “But… What about my husband? He’s up there, too.” See what I had to deal with? To keep from hitting myself repeatedly in the head with my phone I took up writing.

 

 

http://www.gailkoger.com

https://www.facebook.com/Colettiwarlordbooks/

https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1598719.Gail_Koger

https://twitter.com/Askole

https://www.instagram.com/gkoger58/

https://www.bookbub.com/authors/gail-koger

http://www.amazon.com/Gail-Koger/e/B001K838BY

http://gailswarlords30.bsky.social

 

 

 

 

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GIVEAWAY 

Gail Koger will be awarding a $15 Amazon/BN GC to a randomly drawn winner.