Conrad (A.K.A. CJ) is
about to graduate high school. For his final year, he thought he’d mimic the
antics of Judd Nelson in The Breakfast
Club by finally getting revenge on a hated Spanish teacher. Very well done,
indeed! Never
one to follow the crowd, CJ always opted to map his own way, do whatever he
felt like. So, obviously, he was never into any of the important stuff like
voting because “politics was like organized sports to me—to quote Simon and
Garfunkel: every way you look at it you lose.” (18) But, alas, high school doesn’t last forever
and soon he will embark into adulthood with one thing in mind: save his money
and move out of his parents’ house. Easier said than done, right? Especially
when you have to start off in a fast-food and retail chain in a lowly state
like Minnesota.
“Working never struck me as something
that I would be very good at: I didn’t take authority seriously, I didn’t kiss
up to people who got paid to talk down to others, and most importantly, I felt
like I was mentally overqualified for most jobs available to someone within my
age demographic.” (5)
“At 18, I couldn’t say my limited life
experience had been incredibly challenging up until this point, but I managed
to skate by on what I figured most people did in these situations—by
bullshitting.” (21) Ah, yes, the interview, where you get to answer half-baked
questions like “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” and “What are your
greatest weaknesses?” But, hey, we need
to get paid, right?
“Remember,
Conrad: THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT!” (21) Eeek. And, of course, you’re
going to get that customer fighting to the death over the “wrong” change or a
stupid return.
“Is this
what it was all about? I thought. Will the next fifty years of my life consist of
being tortured by some a-hole with an inferiority complex while pulling down minimum
wage? A fifteen percent lunch discount? Death row prisoners have it better!”
(22) Yep!
Intellectually witty and candid, The Customer is Always Wrong is a
delectably humorous and bungling account of working the stale salt mines of greedy
Corporate America. I loved Conrad’s snarky and sarcastic attitude. He learns
that working a job is a deadpan skewer between the eyes. It’s a cold, cruel
jungle out there in the real world. And he narrates it all in this well-versed,
satire comedy!
My rating: 4 stars
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